I wonder what it’s been that I’ve tried to protect myself from. So many of the horrors people are afraid of have happened to me: Attempted murder. Sexual assault(s). Being dumped. Being rejected. Getting failing grades. Being called the worst slur in America. Repeated beatings. Being hungry. Being poor. Having a meltdown on stage. Getting fired. I’ve had all this and more occur in my life and what I don’t understand is how I’ve allowed this to make me shrink back and stop taking bigger risks.
Sure, the pain of those things was awful. I’d get sick to my stomach with anxiety. I’d pray to whomever for the earth to open and swallow me up. I’ve even attempted suicide when I was 11 and thought I couldn’t take another day, but I survived it all. Yet, I never did what I wanted to do either, not very much of it, anyway, terrified that I was being selfish. Even so, the idea that I was supposed to devote myself selflessly to others at my own expense made me angry. Then I’d feel guilty for being angry and assume that I was a bad person for wanting what I wanted – and that’s why I was being punished with rejection and so on. Not true. I am not selfish. Failing doesn’t make me a loser. Playing it safe doesn’t help me.
Being scared is no way to live.
Let’s go out and take risks, even if we’re afraid. We’re stronger than we know.
‘we’re stronger than we know’
that is so true.
thanks for the encouragement
and the inspiration that you are
🙂
Inspirational words. Thank you.
You are stronger, better, and more loved than you know. ♥